


The Written Word of One Keith Kogane

by Talinor



Series: The Dawn Will Come [4]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Background Allura/Shiro (Voltron) - Freeform, Dragon Age Origins AU, M/M, Mild mentions of mpreg, Trans Keith (Voltron)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-03
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2019-01-08 19:02:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12260265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talinor/pseuds/Talinor
Summary: I might as well do something whilst looking around Ferelden, so writing it seems to be. It's perfect- I can write down whatever I wish, and it's likely no one will ever read it. A confidant that doesn't respond back. No strings attached, no messy feelings involved in any matters. Just as things should be.So I must issue a warning to any and all who somehow got their hands on this- close this book now. Leave it wherever you found it and continue on with your life. Because if you keep it, read through it, delve into my secrets like the nosy little rat you seem to be, I will find you.And it will not be pretty, I assure you.





	The Written Word of One Keith Kogane

**Author's Note:**

> just a warning- there is a very very slight segment of attempted rape. It's very short, nothing actually happens, and Keith doesn't have Any of That Shit so it didn't really deserve a tag but I still wanted to make you guys aware of it.  
> I don't have the energy or inspiration to write any more of this au atm, but this has been in my drafts for months so I figured I could at least finish this  
> enjoy!

The Olkari Wilds, as suggested by it's name, is untamable. South of the stainless old walls of Altea, the swamplands range for miles. Few dare to travel through the dark underbelly of the beastly place, and even fewer dare to settle down there save for bandits and the lost souls trapped inside that grew to accept their fate.

There are stories though- rumors whispered amid campfire horror stories. Throwaway endings to the tale of a witch who accepted the deal with a dark dweller of the Fade. Cheap scare tactics alongside the parts about blood sacrifices and luring naughty children into the Wilds to eternal damnation. Rumors that told of a place in the very heart of the Wilds, where few dare to dwell. Rumors that told of a dirt path overgrown by the hedges and vines. Rumors that told you if you found that path and followed it, you'd eventually end up at a clearing.

A clearing that held only an inconspicuous hut. Old and weathered by the cruelties of time and storm, but still standing strong. At first glance, one probably wouldn't suspect that an age-old abomination with the ability to harness the form of a dragon lived there with her daughters. Most adventurers who possibly stumbled upon the home must've been greeted by the inhabitants, and thus were never seen nor heard from again.

Most, that is, except two Grey Wardens. One who grew to become a legendary hero, a respected Commander of the Grey, and a kind-hearted King of Ferelden. Rumors sprung up that he was the one to slay the archdemon and end the Blight. He personally denied them, but he was simply trying to be modest.

At least, that's what most inhabitants of Ferelden believed.

The second slipped through the cracks of history. Despite being a loyal follower of the first nearly to the end. Not much could've shaken the sturdy foundation of trust he had in his fearless leader.

But something did- a life intolerably spared. The sacred Joining ritual of the Wardens treated like a punishment for a vile, unforgivable monster in his eyes. When the decision was made, he was _very_ vocal about his disapproval. The stinging pain of betrayal burned in his heart as the first took his blade away from the newest Warden's intact neck. After the Joining, he swore that he'd be gone after the Blight was over.

He tried to stay true to his word. But the new Queen wanted him to stay for the wedding. The two were close friends, so he reluctantly agreed to do so. For her sake, not her new husband's. He made sure to make that as crystal-clear as humanly possible.

After the reception, he and his closest friends disappeared. The new King and Queen, saddled by so many new responsibilities, didn't have the time to search for them. And thus the second ebbed away from memory.

There are some details the half-truths gloss over, however. Things that slip through the net just as the second Warden did.

For example- after the Blight, if one was to find the fabled hut in the Wilds, they'd find it empty. No signs of struggle in or outside. Everything neatly in place, yet with many empty spaces inbetween. Almost as if those who lived there simply packed up and left.

But hidden under a pile of old robes at the bottom of one of the dresser drawers was a red leather journal. Only black-tinted edges and the faded insignia of a year-dead Denerim bookshop owner on the spine hinted at it's origin. The words written inside were clear and fluid, and spun quite the tale.

One that revealed another puzzle piece.

Day 1-

_It's over. After months of traveling, the Blight is finally over. I can still hear the soldiers cheer off in the burning ruins of Denerim._

_Unsurprisingly, it was easy to sneak off. They were all too wrapped up in their revelry to realize the mage slipping away._

_It wasn't difficult enough to really deserve one, but I figured someone who stayed behind and fought waves of darkspawn at the gates while the others played hero needed a reward. Some kind of memento to remember this time in my life by._

_Thus, this journal I managed to snag from a burning home. Poor fool who owned it never used it, and they were likely dead, so why not? It's not like it's the most important thing to miss during times like these._

_I might as well do something whilst looking around Ferelden, so writing it seems to be. It's perfect- I can write down whatever I wish, and it's likely no one will ever read it. A confidant that doesn't respond back. No strings attached, no messy feelings involved in any matters. Just as things should be._

_So I must issue a warning to any and all who somehow got their hands on this- close this book now. Leave it wherever you found it and continue on with your life. Because if you keep it, read through it, delve into my secrets like the nosy little rat you seem to be, I will find you._

_And it will not be pretty, I assure you._

Day 5-

_I stumbled upon a village today. A small place- barely over 100 people. It was... rustic, in a single word. The wheat fields were bigger than most of the homes. The market was only a few old barely-decorated wooden stalls. Many merchants gave me odd looks as I passed, and some I suspect would've said something to the guards._

_They quickly fell silent with a few silver pieces._

_The room I was given at the inn is a little nook. Cramped by furniture and easy places to hide, if one was desperate enough. It's just like the rest of the village- little and insignificant in the scheme of things. Plus a lingering smell of wet dog._

_It's perfect._

Day 7-

_People whisper of a new Queen rising to the throne. A woman who saw the archdemon firsthand, and rose up with heavy support from Redcliffe's Arl Alfor. They focus on her beauty- her peculiar silver hair and sun-kissed skin- rather than her skill in combat or as a diplomat._

_Typical._

_Still, it's nice to hear Allura's rising up in the world. Not to mention her heroic fiancé who seems to be deeply in love with her._

_The wedding is in a few months. Maybe I can sneak in, just for a little while. Time will be the teller._

Day 10-

_These people are a gossipy bunch. Not to mention absurdly obvious in their staring. I can practically feel their eyes pointed at my back whenever I step out of my room. Of course, they don't dare to look at me openly. They avert their eyes when my back isn't turned to them._

_I don't mind it much for the moment. It's just... a difficult pill to swallow after the past few months. It's strange getting used to hidden judgements again after exposure to open acceptance._

_But get used to it I will. I won't let a bunch of cowards and half-wits get under my skin._

Day 11-

_Today I finally heard the infamous word most of them seemed to have on their minds- apostate. Wherever I go, it seems that ugly word is bound to follow behind. Kin to my own shadow._

_At least I didn't wake up to templars knocking on my door. But I sense it may soon come to that._

_I already have 5 possible escape routes planned. May come up with more just in case._

Day 13-

_Most of the villagers avoid me now. Probably afraid I'll flay them with a fireball if they try anything, I suspect._

_Which, to be honest, is perfectly fine by me. Fear is a much more favorable reaction than irrational hatred or anger. They haven't run me out yet, so I can imagine they're not too afraid of me._

_Yet._

Day 15-

_Not all the villagers hate me, it seems. Some of the merchants turn a blind eye to a few coppers off the full price. One of the farmers, Giles, and his son Erik invited me over to their home for dinner the night before last. Giles is old but kind, dark weathered skin and milky eyes that seemed to look into you whenever they were pointed at you. Erik has lighter skin than his father, yet it's still tanned from hours in the sun._

_Erik's gaze on me is unlike any other, yet not completely unexpected. He doesn't look at me with fear or judgement, but a want. A want that I'd only seen a few times- mainly from glances between Mother and some poor fool she'd dragged home. And once in Shiro's eyes early on when Allura wasn't looking._

_Except Erik's want is different from those times- his want is not soft and sweet, like Shiro's was. Nor is it a raging fire of hunger that yearned to take all it could from its target. It is a spark of... something. Not love, but interest._

_The question is- do I douse that spark? Or allow it to stay- perhaps with a little encouragement?_

_He does have beautiful blue eyes._

Day 16-

_Erik took me out on a walk around his farm today. I made sure it stayed purely friendly the entire time, but I now have an answer to yesterday's question. His want seems to be physical- I caught him staring at certain places a couple of times- yet he feels like he needs to earn it. Like he needs to wine and dine me before he can get the reward he wants._

_He is handsome. And very sweet. It's likely an act, but it's certainly entertaining to watch him stammer and act the gentlemanly fool._

_Really, all he would need to do is simply ask. But he doesn't know that, and he doesn't need to._

Day 18-

_Today I heard the biggest insult these villagers have thrown at me. Admittedly, it wasn't meant to be that way. It was well-meant with the intention of being a compliment, yet it still managed to burn and snag onto my memory._

_Last night I accepted Giles' offer for dinner. They were truly gracious hosts, despite what little they had to offer. It was... fun, being around mirth and laughter without judgement once again. Erik has one of those loud laughs that fills up a room and infects your mood. He was tipsy, but it was still endearing. Almost reminded me of..._

_Never mind._

_Anyways, Erik dragged me to the barn after dinner. The moonlight peeked down at us like a watchful eye on the two of us. It wasn't the most romantic place to talk- the air smelled lightly of manure and many farm animals talked over our conversation. But it was still content. Peaceful._

_At one point, I asked him what he saw in me. Why he was so interested in me. It was out of pure curiosity, and I didn't suspect the answer would offend me._

_He faltered. For several moments before he started to stammer. And not 'cute', embarrassed stammering like he was too shy to say it strongly. No, it was trying to buy him time. Likely to come up with a reason that didn't sound superficial._

_But honestly, I would've preferred 'I want to pin you to the nearest wall and unravel you like a ball of yarn' over what he ended up saying._

_I let him advance closer and closer until my back met the scratchy wooden walls. "Well," he said, chuckling breathlessly. I could practically taste the alcohol on his breath, he was so close. Not that I minded too much at the time. "I mean, y'seem like a nice lady. Not too bad-lookin' either."_

_'A nice lady'?!_

_I was as gracious a guest as I could be, so it wasn't the 'nice' part that got to me. Guess Shiro rubbed off on me more than I'd thought._

_But the moment Erik called me a 'lady', a chill crept up my spine. Suddenly the proximity between us was too close for comfort. I felt absolutely sick, and I know it's too early to get that reaction because of the child._

_If I even am with child. I haven't heard anything about Lance. What if he...?_

_Never mind. It's too late to worry about all of that now. I refuse to go back. I can do this on my own, and I will._

_But if I am with child, then I suspect the feelings I had tonight are only going to intensify. Especially when I can no longer hide it._

Day 19-

_Went out of the village for a little while. Word spreads fast in such a small community. By now, I imagine how everyone has somehow heard of the mysterious ""seductress"" led poor, foolish young Erik on last night. How 'she' practically dangled 'herself' on a string for him to bite at, only to get away at the last opportunity. Leaving the confused and hurt 'victim' alone. Practically every gossip's dream story right there._

_It has the best elements to it- a blossoming romance, a misguided yet honest protagonist, an evil mage 'woman' with no regard for anything except 'her' own entertainment. Love, lust. Betrayal, heartbreak. I imagine many ate that story up with an ignorant smile._

_The truth is far less poetic. In my distraught and sleep-deprived state, I neglected to write down how the night really ended._

_He kissed me. I pushed him away immediately, but he finally found the nerve to go for it. If I wasn't absolutely disgusted with him in that moment, I would've applauded him on finally growing a backbone._

_He looked like a kicked puppy when I pushed him away. But he didn't look hurt. He didn't look confused._

_He was pouting. Upset that just when he had the nerve to reach for what he wanted, it flew away from him. "What's wrong?" He asked. "Was it somethin' I said?" His calloused hands went to my waist. He was getting closer than he was before the kiss._

_Part of me actually felt... bad for him. Damn Shiro's empathetic influence._

_"No," I assured him, visibly uncomfortable with the proximity. "It's just that..." I had to nudge him away. "I... do not want this. Not right now."_

_Reasonable. At least, I thought so. I thought Erik would understand. He would've been a bit disappointed, but he'd understand._

_He did not understand._

_He just kept trying. Kept grabbing, kept gripping, kept us as close as he possibly could. He left a few light marks on my neck despite my very clear protests._

_But that's alright, because I left my own marks on him. Nothing permanent, but a magically-superheated slap to the face was enough to get the point across. "If you ever touch me again," I growled as he fell to his knees in pain. "I will not be so kind to you."_

_I imagine I got my point across._

Other such stories graced the pages. Day by day by day, each one told at least one new memory. An update on the apostate's day to day life. None of which were truly _wanted,_ but the words were still graced by the sight of new eyes. 

Stories of struggle, of loneliness, of reflection. The writer would hint ever so slightly at missing the life he had during the Blight and then switch to an entirely different topic. As if he wouldn't allow himself the privilege of missing his friends when he was the one to leave them behind in the first place. Three pages were dedicated to them- a paragraph of description (painted through the mind's eye of his opinion) and a rough portrait of them.

They weren't completely flawless, but each and every one was read almost greedily, searching for any potential clues or answers. They still admired every story given to them, but they weren't useful to the search.

Until they found passages number 273-275.

Day 273-

_The wedding was last night. Denerim has definitely healed from the wounds the Blight inflicted upon it, though scars still remain from it. That much was evident from the sheer jubilation of the event. Happiness was certainly a convincing mask for desperation to wear. Just not convincing enough._

_The reception was open to all- a mistake, in my opinion. It would've been much too easy for something to go horribly wrong. If I was a leftover follower of Zarkon, it would have been very plausible for me to strike down the happy newlywed royals and escape. There were guards, but those are hardly a deterrent against those determined enough._

_Using some of Flemeth's old robes, I disguised as a harmless pregnant widow much too easily. I loathed every second of acting like a woman, but I couldn't risk discovery. Barely anyone batted an eye at me. It was a rush, a game in its own right. In fact, at one point I got so cocky as to go right up to the new King and humbly congratulate him._

_I saw a hint of uncertain recognition in his busy work-tired eyes. He still knew my face, even after months of nothing from me. I felt uncertain that I could get out of this. But I acted innocent, batted my eyelashes, and asked: "Is something the matter, my lord?"_

_His brows furrowed. He hesitated to answer, and I smiled up at him. "...No," he finally answered. "You just... reminded me of a friend of mine for a moment there." He smiled, letting the uncertainty melt off his expression. "Enjoy your evening, ma'am."_

_He looked quite handsome in his silver armor. A dragon's face was carved into the chestplate- highly appropriate for the Hero King of Ferelden. Allura wore a similar suit of armor, save for looking lighter and in a fitting golden color. Many were scandalized at the prospect- the new Queen didn't even wear any jewels along with it._

_I'm so proud of her. They're going to make good rulers for Ferelden._

_I didn't see Hunk nor Pidge at the reception- the latter probably due to their unfortunate condition- but I did see Lance as I was going to leave. He had a traveling pack strapped to his back and light leather armor. I tried slipping past him so he wouldn't possibly recognize me._

_At the very last second, I looked back to him. Our eyes met._

_I can say with absolute certainty that he recognized me._

Day 274-

_It's going to be soon. I can feel it. Thus, tomorrow's entry will be the last. I can't stay in Mother's hut any longer than that._

_The only reason I'm staying today is to purge any evidence I ever lived here. Anything that isn't important enough to carry with me shall be burned. I can't have anything that could possibly lead her back to me._

_I would sooner die than lead her back to me. She will not poison my child's life like she did mine. I'd do anything to protect us from that._

Passage 275 wasn't written in the same hand as the rest. Instead, it was a few pages ripped from some other book and taped into this one.

They detailed the paths Dalish elves commonly walked in the Olkari Wilds, their magic, and most importantly- Eluvians. Magical mirrors, doorways to a different dimension separated from both Thedas and the Fade, and how the Dalish commonly found them.

The last page held only three words in harsh yet careful black ink- _**You're welcome, boy. -F**_

Lance closed the journal with a slight smile. He tucked it away into his travel pack in a secure spot.

Pidge popped their head in through the old hut's open doorway. "Did you find anything useful? Something to help us find him?" They leaned against their staff like a walking stick.

"Yes," he said, standing up from his rickety wooden seat. "As a matter of fact, I did."

Hunk was next. "What did you find?"

He turned toward them with a slight smile. "You guys don't happen to know anything about the Dalish, do you?"

**Author's Note:**

> comments are always appreciated!  
> seriously guys, they're my Lifeblood  
> my tumblr: squishy--squish


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